How you found me (a search terms round-up)

Because I like search term round-ups.

what’s so scary about house of leaves – The answer to your question is everything.

robert fagels ovid – I would pay big money for that. Big money. Huge. Unfortunately, Robert Fagles died before Kickstarter existed, so I never had the chance to offer big money for that, and now it can never be. You will have to console yourself by reading his Odyssey again.

can you read monsters of men ness alone – NO! You crazy lunatic! What is wrong with you? You should not even contemplate reading Monsters of Men alone! If you read Monsters of Men alone, you will not understand what it means when, oh God, when Todd’s with the Mayor and he hears (spoilers) Early one morning, just as the sun was rising, oh God. Oh Todd. Tears in my eyes. There are never not tears in my eyes when I think about that part.

Unless you mean can you read Monsters of Men alone as in, by yourself without anyone else around? In which case the answer is yes. In fact that is preferable. Because then your roommate/significant other/family won’t see you bawling like a baby.

hawkeye comics too expensive – It is a very reasonable price as well as being the best thing ever. Don’t gripe to me. Or just wait for the trade paperback. Sheesh.

bechdel test talk for how long – Dude, come on. Long enough for a conversation. Don’t be this person.

what kind of people would like to read wuthering heights – A question for the ages. Because in my opinion, Wuthering Heights is terrible. Everyone in it is terrible. Why are Heathcliff and Cathy like that? Why would you read Wuthering Heights when Jane Eyre is right there being basically the best book ever?

marquess of queensberry curse – The curse is that the family is crazy crazy. It is hard to get away from thousands of years of super crazy in your genes. I am gleeful about this up to the death of Alfred Douglas in 1945, and sad for all subsequent descendants. It is not their fault. Oh, except for the ones who married bin Ladens. They really did that to themselves. PS I’d just like to remind you that Bosie is related by marriage to Osama bin Laden.

love of creepy geeks – It would be way more fun if this search term led to my blog for a reason other than my having posted about Geek Love a few years ago. (I strenuously disliked that book.) But oh well.

The last one, my true favorite, contains spoilers for the Harry Potter series (book five and on). If you haven’t read that far, stop reading now and go read that far because those books are awesome and you need them in your life.

i’m having problems dealing with sirius black’s death – My blog’s the fourth result on Google if you run this search. Y’all, can we do some low-level Google-bombing to bump me up a little bit? For I, too, am having problems dealing with this. In that I can’t ever deal with it. Because it’s just too awful for poor Harry, and his sadness cuts me like knives. Jenny’s Books: In heavy denial since 2003.

Also, today’s date is a command. Say it a lot. I will be. March forth! Allons-y!

43 thoughts on “How you found me (a search terms round-up)

  1. These posts are so fun. Did you edit this or have you managed to escape the peculiar search results? Regarding your geek love post, it’s weird how that showed up.

  2. This is so weird; I was just considering consulting Teresa about doing one of these. People find us in very different ways than they find you (mostly wanting us to do their homework for them) but these are great. And I would pay a lot of money for a Fagles translation of Ovid, too. And I, too, have problems with the same thing the searcher above has problems with. (God, why can’t we have spoilers???)

    • Hahaha, a lot of mine are people wanting their homework done for them, but those searches don’t make very interesting post-fodder. Why why why didn’t Fagles translate Ovid before he died?

  3. Robert Fagles is dead? Ouch. On the plus side – googling him just now – I see he translated The Aeneid before shuffling off his mortal coil (I already have his translations of The Odyssey and Ulysses) so I’m a happy camper.

    • He is, I’m afraid. It makes me sad on many occasions. But I shouldn’t gripe — as you say, he did leave behind a very wondrous body of work. I’m just greedy.

    • Noted! I don’t think I get enough search terms to make it a regular regular feature, but I will consider doing it periodically, if enough good search terms show up.

  4. I love that you answered the question about how long to talk, with “dude, don’t be this person”. This is a hilarious post, and I agree that it should be a regular feature. Can I also say that you have the best mom ever! My mom has never left even one comment on my blog!

  5. Please talk to me about the Marquess of Queensbury curse. Or I guess I could google it. But I feel like it’d be funnier coming from you (JUST HAZARDING A GUESS).

    Also yes to the Wuthering Heights thing. That book sucks ass. What terrible people.

  6. How much you enjoy ‘Wuthering Heights’ depends very much on how seriously you take it. If you see it as the protracted Gothic fantasy written by somebody who had led a very sheltered life and knew very little about human nature, but nonetheless had a vivid imagination – in other words, as not being realistic at all – it’s quite enjoyable.

  7. I completely agree with the last search term (the mysterious hidden one filled with spoilers) but that discussion is for another time. Thanks for making my day:)

  8. You make me smile 🙂

    So I am going to sound really stupid, but I feel like when I go to my Google Analytics, I do not find fun search terms to get to my blog – how do you all find these fun ones?!

    • Oh, I don’t know! I just glance at the WordPress “Site Stats” area periodically, and they tell me what search terms people have been using over the last two days. And if I see a good one I write it down for later.

  9. Yours are so funny. My search terms are always so boringly predictable- title, author, repeat. The one about Geek Love made me laugh out loud because I disliked the book too!

  10. I love this – hilarious! I used to have great search engine terms, like ‘Can I date a vampire?’ (Answer: you can, but the question is ‘may you’). Now they have become very staid and sensible. I miss the daft ones.

  11. I did this once because there are some batty ones out there. I’m a little sad I stopped writing them down. I should do that again. Anyway, I loved your response to the bechdel test query the most. 🙂

    • I always forget to write them down! This post occurred because I put them in with my TBR list .txt document, so I had them on hand when I was thinking of doing this post.

  12. I thought Geek Love hysterical. It brings a smile to my face finding that book and thinking what a wild insane book. I probably won’t ever read it again, though. But you know that.

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